I'm a Dreamer, and That Is My Strength
Imagine if a TV show production team had to come up with loads of new material every day for the length of an entire lifespan.
Writers and producers would struggle to create new characters from scratch. The costume team would be switching decades every week. The sheer mental will needed to constantly come up with new content would be a menace to the production team and everyone on it. As we know from watching shows that outlive their time, they would probably end up creating some weird content.
Dreams are a window into my psyche
My dreams aren’t consciously produced, but the depth of them still blows my mind. Once I began looking at my constant stream of dreams as a strength, I realized how useful they are.
Symbols used in my dreams help me to see inside the struggle of my psyche. My dreams are like a snapshot of what my unconscious mind is processing at the time.
My dreams keep me company
I can easily say that dreams constitute a huge part of my life. As a person with narcolepsy, I experience a great deal of vivid dreams. These range from seeing hallucinations of people and things in my room at night to diving through a constant stream of storyline mash-ups with different crowds of people each time.
I must admit that my brain is extremely creative to be able to provide a new source of live entertainment each night. The fact that my dreams provide me entertainment might seem silly. However, in a world where my waking hours are limited and oftentimes lonely, I appreciate my dreams for keeping me company.
Dreams as a call-to-action
Aside from providing entertainment, my constant vivid dreams also provide insight into my unconscious mind. When I need to assert stronger boundaries with someone, I will often dream of us fighting physically and verbally. When I am struggling to satisfy 2 dichotomies of my consciousness that are somehow both feeling unheard, my mind will play out scenarios in my dreams that provide insight into the processes going on in my mind.
If I am craving human interaction, I will often dream of conversations where I feel connected and enjoy myself with other people. My dreams almost always result in a symbolic call-to-action that ultimately leaves me better off than I was before.
I cannot run away from my dreams
As someone who has suffered complex trauma, I am able to shut off my mind from realizing certain conditions in my life to make things easier on myself short-term. However, my dreams shake me awake and encourage me to make the changes in my life that I need. As a person with narcolepsy, I can’t run from my dreams.
Depending on the severity of my narcolepsy symptoms, my dreams can constitute more of my life than my wakeful hours. My dreams serve as reminders of what I am neglecting in myself and other things that I’d sometimes rather not realize. I find that my dreaming is an insightful tool that I can never put down. As I strive to create peace within myself, my inner dream world becomes more peaceful as well.
Do you feel that your doctor understands narcolepsy?