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This Sucks!

I’m starting to believe that I’m going to be alone forever at this point. No one lasts too long in my life because I’m “unreliable" or "unavailable when they need me". I fall asleep while friends are crying asking for support or advice. I don’t show up to events that mean a lot to my friends or family. Sometimes I just feel so weak and sluggish that I cannot drag myself to get up and do the things I should be doing.

My relationships don’t last for the same reasons. I’m starting to believe I’ll be alone forever. I’m tired of explaining what narcolepsy is to everyone. I’m tired of people thinking I’m using it as an excuse to get out of things.

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Narcolepsy literally ruined my life. I can’t hold on to relationships or friendships. I can’t even laugh too hard without my body collapsing, to the point I avoid laughing. I avoid enjoyable moments because I’m afraid of having cataplexy attacks. It just really sucks all around.

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